Wednesday, November 23, 2005
Philosophical Necrophilia

Between 8:00 AM of today and present moment, the first day of Thanksgiving break has effectually transformed into The Day of 10,000 Naps. Well, actually it's only been about three naps of sinfully long duration, but I enjoy exaggerating. So I arose from one of these self-indulgent bouts of idleness a short while ago, and felt rather worthless. I decided that I'd better get an early start on my homework lest it be saved until Sunday night, when it would most possibly be altogether ignored. Anyway, I pulled out Henry David Thoreau's "Walden," the first chapter of which I was assigned to read for my English class. 6 pages in and I've already been barraged by a frightfully painful encumbrance of philosophical contrivances and half-assed theories.
This particular quote was expressly troublesome:
"To know that we know what we know, and that we do not know what we do not know, that is true knowledge," said Confucius.
Two words: Shut the fuck up. This shitty piece of "wisdom" is a prime example of an entire collection of soul-crushingly meaningless quotes that have been excreted by various bearded imbeciles, often deemed "philosophers," in the history of our species. None of these quotes mean anything; they just confuse the shit out of the reader and often leaves him/her in intellectual paralysis that leads, finally, into acceptance and glorification of the quote as absolute ingenuity. Any dumb person could throw together a brain-splitting series of subtle contradictions, syntax errors, and trivial circumstantiality and come off as profoundly intelligent. Even truly genius individuals in history have been whorified: their words fallen victim to the disjointed service of the general people's fetish for quick and clever solutions of word and not deed. This is the appalling nature of philosophical "reasoning"; it seems to disconnect the very virtue it was intended to provoke: real thought. People don't think about their problems anymore, they just attribute the solution to some all-encompassing piece of philosophical garbage, usually clever subtleties torn out of their intellectual context.